Feels like you're ready to allow someone new into your life? But did you know that going on dates again right away can be too much?
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FIRST OF ALL: YOUR EMOTIONS AFTER A BREAKUP
Yes, dating again to feel better is usually not a good idea! As Jennifer Pearson says, "find acceptance and closure first."
Breakups are tough for everyone. When a relationship ends, especially if it was a tough one, you might feel these emotions:
- Anger
- Betrayal
- Abandonment
- Depression
Feeling these things is normal at first. But the most important thing is to understand why the breakup happened before moving on.
In this study, researchers looked at how breakups affected young adults aged 20-25. They found that those who understood why their relationship ended had:
- less anxiety and depression;
- fewer problems in future relationships;
- better relationship skills as they got older according to their peers.
Based on a detailed research project consisting of three studies, it was found that self-compassion played a key role in helping individuals cope better with a romantic breakup.
The study by Zhang and Chen in 2017 showed that those who took ownership of their part in the breakup experienced more positive outcomes.
People who were kind to themselves and admitted that they played a part in the end of the relationship had a more positive outlook on future relationships. They were also more driven to improve themselves and had a greater appreciation for people who might become future partners.
"It's amazing that these positive changes stayed the same even after taking into account things like self-esteem and attachment styles," says Jennifer Pearson.
Another typical problem is trust loss. It especially hurts when you start a new relationship. If that’s your case and you’re wondering how to catch someone cheating, look into this catch a cheater app.
7 THINGS THAT CAN RESTART YOUR DATING LIFE
After we've learned enough facts, we can move on to the practical part. Let's look at the seven most important things that make for a healthy dating life after a breakup.
1. YOUR PASSIONS
After a long relationship, you might have lost touch with your personal interests.
"Make a list of activities you love, like biking, visiting farmers' markets, or trying new recipes," advices J. Pearson.
2. SELF-LOVE
Take some time to love yourself before you start dating again. Enjoy who you are and be proud of your journey. Before looking for a relationship, you should know how valuable you are as a single person.
In a relationship and got that cheating anxiety? Try this app to catch a cheater!
3. YOUR NEEDS
Before asking yourself how to find someone's dating profile and go on dates, know what you want in a partner and a relationship.
Tell the difference between needs that can't be changed, like wanting to feel safe and understood, and wants, like wanting certain physical traits. Being aware of your needs helps you build strong relationships in the future.
4. YOUR TIME
"Allow yourself the time you need to heal, but don't let fear stop you too long. Give yourself a reasonable amount of time to start dating again," notes J. Pearson.
5. YOUR FEELINGS
When you should start dating again is up to you. Pay attention to how you're feeling and don't go on dates when you're lonely or scared.
"No matter what other people say or think, trust your gut," says Pearson.
6. FEARLESSNESS
You'll probably be ready to start dating again when these thought would no longer scare you. Curiosity should be stronger than any fears or doubts. To explore romantic options, you need to be emotionally stable.
7. PERMISSION
Allow yourself to begin dating again once you've healed and learned to love yourself. Write yourself a permission slip as a way to show that you are strong.
Remember that you don't need approval from other people to pursue happiness. Believe what you're telling yourself and jump when you're ready. Now, if you’re ready, try a dating app search! And if you’re here to learn how to catch a cheater, try this catch a cheater app.
