Everyone knows, what we did in the past can have a big effect on how we act in relationships now. If we have unresolved emotional wounds, they can become something like hidden traps triggered by certain situations or behaviours that remind us of those past hurts. This can make us react in ways that don’t really fit the current moment.
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For example, if we've been cheated on before and our current partner talks about their own experience, it makes us feel angry, betrayed, or insecure. These feelings usually aren’t really about what your partner did, but if you need more confidence, here’s some of the best ways to catch a cheating spouse.
1. PAUSE
When you feel a strong emotional reaction coming on, take a moment to pause. This helps you avoid reacting impulsively. Recognize these intense emotions as your warning sign to take a break.
2. CALM DOWN
Cry, take deep breaths, or focus on how your body feels to let go of your feelings. Here's a simple trick: try to notice where in your body the feeling is, like in your chest; then place your hand on that spot and just let the feeling be there without trying to change it.
Breathe into the sensation, imagining your breath opening up space around it. Send some warmth and kindness to that area, not to make the feeling go away, but to gently acknowledge it.
3. REVIEW WHAT HAPPENED
Go over the events step by step. For instance, "I said this, then he responded with that, and then I reacted like this."
4. REFLECT ON YOUR INTERPRETATIONS
Think about the stories you’re telling yourself about your partner. What assumptions are you making? Write these down.
For example, if your partner were talking about cheating, try to look through the most popular cheating apps to make sure that your partner is honest.
5. DISCUSS YOUR ASSUMPTIONS WITH YOUR PARTNER
Share your assumptions with your partner and allow them to understand you; this talk can help you feel better and speed up the healing process. This also helps you get closer to your partner because you can clear up any confusion by talking about your feelings and thoughts.
BOTTOM LINE
Triggers can catch us off guard, like an unexpected family member who stays too long and makes things awkward. First, you need to be aware of your trigger. Next, you should remember how you felt before those emotions took over.
Finding the part of you that felt good, maybe even happy, even if it was a long time ago is the first step toward joining something new.
And if you’re still unsure about your triggers? Here you can find hidden social media profiles photos texts and much more.