Why do we stick into relationships? Having fun together, sharing jokes, and loving each other! But the most crucial thing? It's respect. That's what really counts.
“Respect is super important in any healthy relationship" says Wilda Harrison, a relationship psychologist. And when respect is missing, it's a big red flag!
“Disrespect shows up in different ways, but usually leads to the same thing: breaking up,” Harrison says.
RELATED: 3 REASONS WHY PEOPLE USE CHEATING APPS
So, let's talk about how love and respect go hand in hand, the signs that show disrespect, how it can mess up a relationship, and what you can do to fix things!
LOVE AND RESPECT
Love and respect are like best buddies—they belong together. Love is all about feeling that warm affection, being crazy about someone, and feeling super connected emotionally.
Respect means that you really like and admire your partner as a person.
In a recent study, scientists figured out what makes love tick. They came up with this neat idea that respect is a big part of what makes love meaningful.
They also found out such important things about love in a relationships:
- attraction;
- connection;
- trust.
Worried that your partner doesn’t love you anymore? Try this free dating profile search.
5 SIGNS OF DISRESPECT IN A RELATIONSHIP
Sometimes, it's hard to notice when your partner isn't showing enough respect.
If you take care of the house and family while your partner works full-time, for example, don't think less of your work. One good example is even using dating or even cheating apps.
If your partner mocks something you say in front of your family or misses important events like your office dinner party, you might try to excuse their behavior. But ask yourself: is this really respectful?
Here are five common signs to watch out for:
1. They Ignore Your Boundaries
If your partner keeps ignoring the boundaries you've set, that's a red flag. Healthy relationships thrive on mutual respect for each other's limits.
It can come in different forms like borrowing money and not paying it back, invading personal space, or making unwanted physical advances. These actions shouldn't be taken lightly and can worsen over time.
2. They’re Lying
Lying from your partner isn't just a small issue – it's a big problem. Wilda Harrison points out that lying is a disrespectful and harmful behavior in any relationship.
It means your partner is only thinking about themselves and not how their actions affect you.
3. They’re Calling Your Names
During arguments, pay attention to how your partner behaves. When they start yelling, calling you names, or making threats, it's a sign of disrespect, says Wilda Harrison.
It’s like a rule: hurtful words always show a lack of respect in the relationship.
Sometimes, they may try to pass off mean jokes as harmless banter. Mockery, sarcastic remarks, or jokes that feel mean are subtle signs of disrespect.
Please, get it right: humor is a pretty normal thing, but it shouldn't be used to belittle your feelings.
4. They Interrupt You
Does your partner always talk over you, interrupt your stories, or finish your sentences? Cutting someone off mid-sentence often means that their thoughts don't matter.
It's not just impolite; it shows deeper issues – thinking they're superior.
5. They Don’t Value Your Time
It's not good if your partner doesn't respect your time. If you're the only one adjusting your schedule to fit theirs, or if they never seem to care about what's important to you, that's a problem.
It shows they don't appreciate your values as much as they should.
HOW DISRESPECT HURTS YOUR RELATIONSHIPS?
Well, when someone disrespects you, it can really mess up your relationships.
You may start feeling unsure about yourself and lose confidence. Or you may get even more upset about how you're being treated and feel like you're not important
And the person who's being disrespectful, if they're not stopped, might get even worse. They could keep doing hurtful things and maybe even start being emotionally abusive.
Disrespect can start small, like ignoring someone, and then turn into something bigger, like feeling like you're better than them. John Gottman, who studied relationships for fifty years, found that feeling of superiority or disdain, called contempt, is the biggest reason why couples break up.
WHAT TO DO IF YOU FEEL DISRESPECTED?
“Can you look up people on Tinder?” is a good question that you may ask in this instance, trying to quit your relationship, but don’t worry! There are a couple of things you can try to make things better.
Start by paying attention to how you both talk to each other, especially when there's a disagreement.
Studies suggest some useful strategies:
- listening;
- expressing how you feel;
- paying attention to what's being said.
For instance, if your partner makes fun of your hair in front of your family and it bothers you, you can say, “It hurts me when you make jokes about my hair. I’d appreciate it if you could say nice things when we're with others.”
Then, your partner repeats what they heard without getting defensive, trying to understand your point of view. Also, try making eye contact and if it's okay, a gentle touch can help too.
Did you clearly say what you expect? For example, if your partner agreed to tidy up the desk every night because you work from home, they should stick to it without you having to remind them. If they cross these lines, speak up – keep these boundaries in place.
BOTTOM LINE
Well, mistakes can happen, but in healthy relationships, couples talk about them. They appreciate each other and pay attention to what's important.
And if you still have trust issues? You can always learn how to find out if someone is on Tinder, for instance.
