Manipulation involves using mental distortion and emotional exploitation to control and influence others, with the goal of gaining power and control over them. The manipulator identifies their target's vulnerabilities and exploits them for their own benefit.
Once a manipulator has succeeded in getting what they want from their victim, they are likely to continue using these tactics until the victim puts a stop to it. However, this can be challenging, particularly when dealing with someone who is chronically manipulative. Seeking support during this process is strongly recommended.
It can be difficult to recognize manipulative behavior in a relationship, especially if it started out subtly. Over time, it can become the norm in the relationship. This article provides guidance on how to identify signs of emotional manipulation and respond effectively to manipulative behavior in relationships.
7 Forms of Manipulation in Relationships
If you're constantly feeling drained, anxious, fearful, or doubtful of your own thoughts and feelings in a relationship, it's possible that you're experiencing emotional manipulation. Trust your instincts and watch out for these signs:
1. Gaslighting
Someone who gaslights you will lie, blame, and minimize what you're feeling. They will make you doubt yourself and your emotions, in order to control what you think and do. Pay attention to how you feel after spending time with the person. You may feel confused, disappointed in yourself, or like you can't trust yourself.
2. Passive-Aggressive Behavior
A person who behaves passive-aggressively will use avoidance tactics, sarcasm, and dramatic gestures to get attention instead of expressing their true feelings.
3. Lying and Blaming
Emotionally manipulative people often refuse to take responsibility for their actions and may lie or shift the blame onto others.
4. Threats and Coerciveness
Someone who threatens or forces you to do something is emotionally manipulative. This could include threatening to leave you or hurt themselves if you don't do what they want.
5. Withdrawal and Withholding
If your partner withdraws from you, gives you the silent treatment, or withholds information, affection, or sex to punish you, they are manipulating you.
6. Isolation
An emotionally manipulative person may try to cut off your contact with friends and family, or gain their support for their own benefit. They may also try to alienate you from your support system to keep you in the relationship.
5 Ways to Address Manipulative Behavior in a Relationship
Manipulation, including emotional abuse, is never acceptable behavior from a partner or anyone else in your life. Recognizing manipulation and learning how to respond to it is essential.
1. Acknowledge the Manipulation
Do not dismiss emotional manipulation as insignificant. It can be difficult to recognize, but it is important to address it when it is present. Admit to being in an emotionally manipulative relationship if that is the case.
2. Talk Directly to Your Partner
If you are being manipulated, confront your partner and point out specific examples of their behavior that are affecting you. Be specific about the forms of manipulation and how they make you feel. Have an honest and open conversation, for example, "When you tell me I said something I didn't say, it makes me feel frustrated and confused. Can we discuss what is happening?"
3. Seek Professional Help
Understanding the root of emotional manipulation and addressing it can be challenging. Consider attending counseling sessions with your partner. If that's not an option, you could see a therapist on your own to gain insight and find ways to communicate better with your partner. A mental health professional can help you and your partner understand how to address manipulative behavior, particularly if it is linked to mental health conditions.
4. Set Clear Boundaries
It is crucial to establish boundaries in any relationship, especially if manipulation is present. Have a conversation with your partner about acceptable and unacceptable behavior, and outline the consequences of crossing those boundaries. For instance, you might say, "If you continue to deny my feelings, I will end this conversation and take time for myself." If the manipulation persists, consider setting an internal boundary to end the relationship if necessary.
5. Take Action to Protect Yourself
In some instances, emotional abuse can lead to physical abuse. If you feel in danger, take steps to protect yourself. Let friends and family know that you plan to leave your partner, and make an exit plan. If you live with your partner, consider finding a safe place to stay.
A Word From iFindCheaters
At the end of the day, honesty and trust are the foundation of any healthy relationship. It can be challenging to recognize and address, but acknowledging the manipulation, talking to your partner, seeking professional help, setting clear boundaries, and taking steps towards leaving the relationship if necessary are all effective ways to address manipulative behavior.
Wilda Harrison holds an unpopular view regarding manipulation in relationships: "Knowing that manipulation can come from unresolved mental health issues or traumas is just as important as recognizing and dealing with it. When you only look at manipulative behavior as a character flaw, you miss how complicated people are and how they can grow and change through therapy and understanding. Emotional manipulation is often caused by deep-seated fears and weaknesses that need to be addressed with compassion and professional help instead of harsh punishment."
If you struggling with trust to your partner, it can be helpful to use iFindCheaters' services to remove any doubts you may have about the relationship. We offer discreet and anonymous online services to help you find out if your partner’s cheating with social media and dating sites. By removing doubts, you can establish trust and move towards a healthier relationship.
