To forgive you don’t have to forget.
This F-word is probably not the first one that popped into your mind. There is a trifecta of F-words essential to rebuilding trust after infidelity: forgiveness, fun and friendship. You find out you have a cheating partner, so what should you do?
Think before you freak.
If your relationship is new, you might cut your losses and move on. But what if you are married? What if you have a family? Although all three F-words are equally important we begin with Forgiveness.
Forgiveness is key for reconciliation.
Trying to forget or ignore what happened is impractical and unhealthy. You need to talk with your partner about how his or her cheating made you feel. Ask them to share with you what they really want so that you can satisfy them more. Share what turns you on also, your partner wants to know the satisfy you too. Every relationship takes two. It is extremely important that you are on the same page as to whether your connection is worth fighting for.
Fundamental to loving relationships:
Fun is an essential element in any successful relationship. The daily grind of work and routine responsibilities make us forget to play. Doing things together that you both enjoy is super important. Savoring moments with your partner deepens intimacy and strengthens your connection. Sure, we need to work hard to support ourselves materially, but love and laughter are what make life worth living. Make time for fun and create little surprises for your partner that brighten his or her day and give them a reason to think about you.
The Friendzone isn’t always the endzone.
Friendship is the most solid foundation that any relationship can be built upon. Friends share the good times and support each other through the hard times. As a friend you strive to be a better person and to encourage your partner to become his/her best self.
Friendship means having the courage to have the difficult discussions: you can be ruthlessly sincere, but always with loving kindness.
If you can forgive, focus on the fun and cultivate your friendship, then you can save your relationship if you both want to. Even if it doesn’t work out in the end, by forgiving your partner you will be investing in your own health and happiness! Every relationship
has the capacity to reveal aspects of our selves that we may not have been aware of.
The better we know ourselves, the better our chances of finding someone we can build a life with.
Jennifer Pearson, a relationship psychologist, says that forgiving someone is an important part of rebuilding trust after cheating, but forgiving someone doesn't mean forgetting about what happened. "On the other hand, saying that forgiveness is the key to reconciliation is too simple. Forgiving someone can be helpful, but it's not always possible or even a good idea. Additionally, suggesting that giving in to a cheating partner's wants without dealing with the real problems may keep the relationship unhealthy."
For more information about how to reconcile your relationship after infidelity read this:
https://ifindcheaters.com/blog/post/relationship-resuscitation-is-reconciliation-possible-after-infidelity/
Read here to learn more about how we find cheaters:
https://ifindcheaters.com/blog/post/how-we-find-cheaters/
