20 minutes a day can keep cheating away! In fact, it can help keep the doctor away too. 20 minutes of quality communication with your partner not only brings you closer it boosts your immune system. Love and longevity are interconnected.
The Drs. Gottman prescribe a 20-minute daily talk to couples who feel they are being overwhelmed by daily pressures. Intention builds connection. Learning how to actively listen to your partner is empowering to your relationship and a better sex life.
Joy to the world!
According to the Harvard happiness study, joy is the secret ingredient to living and loving for a long time. Wealth is lower on the list than love when it comes to life satisfaction. By carving out those 20 dedicated minutes every day you are investing in your joy factor. You can do it while taking a walk, or stretched out in bed, the important thing is sharing with and listening to each other.
But I already know everything!
Trust me, you don’t. And if you think you do your relationship is doomed. This 20-minute conversation is an opportunity to rediscover the person you fell in love with every day. It may seem a bit awkward at first, but if you are sincere you will get the hang of it. And the benefits rock!
The point of this exercise is not to force your partner to listen to you complain about, well, everything. You should be working to create the relationship you’ve always dreamt about. Don’t fall into the trap of focusing only on the hassles, share your vision of how you want things to be. Tell each other about dreams and fantasies. Invest in sensual exploration.
Get your grateful on.
Take inventory of the little things you love about your partner. Remind yourself and them why you fell in love. By giving attention to the things you love most about them you encourage those things. Letting them know that you feel grateful for having them in your life. Everyone wants to feel loved and appreciated, including your partner.
Empower your relationship.
When you share candid desires, the risk of cheating disappears. Remember that old saying? “A bird in the hand…” By talking about what turns you on you will turn on your partner too! Happiness is not an accident it is a dynamic state. Savor it, fertilize it, revel in it!
Look for the humor.
We all face annoying situations in day to day life. Looking for the humor is a great way to disarm and deescalate hassles. When you’ve had a hard day, laughter is the antidote for frustration. If you share the challenges with your partner in a humorous way, that helps you both. Humor helps you shake off the small setbacks so you can focus on your relationship and being there for each other.
Decide to be happy.
Proactively working on your happiness is a great idea. Set small short-term goals that you can collaborate on. A weekend getaway is a good start. Carving out a little together time away from the daily grind can be a real boost. Use that time to discuss longer term goals and dreams.
Loving should be fun.
Relationships take work, but they take play too. Finding balance there is a matter of communication. When you listen actively you will learn the little things that make your partner happy. Small surprises can make a big difference. Sexy notes slipped in pockets can make someone’s day. Use your imagination, but get the intel too and your relationship will be a blast.