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love in the time of covid 19

Peace of mind illustrated by a human figure with arms outstretched inside the outline of a head in profile.
Can we achieve piece of mind in a pandemic?

Like relationships were not difficult enough already, right?

Cheating is never a good thing, but thecorona virus pandemichas added an entirely new risk level to “playing the field”. If you are looking for love, online flirtation is safer now than meeting face to face. Justbe cautiousabout disclosing personal sensitive information to people you don’t really know.

If you are in a relationship but dissatisfied for any reason – let your partner know! Things that are not working can only be fixed if you communicate. If there is already friction, the tension of this situation can make it much worse. The only way to protect each other is by being clear, direct andhonest. Constructive criticism may sting a bit at first, but it is an opportunity to grow. Just keep it respectful and coming from a place of genuine concern and interest.

Social Distancing and Intimacy

A challenge like sheltering in place is much easier to face if you have a support system. If you are already in acommitted relationship, consider yourself lucky. That doesn’t mean getting through this will be a cake walk. Sudden confinement can be a game changer. No longer having the other activities in our day means losing intellectual space along with physical space.

If you have just started dating it will be hard to keep the momentum going. On the other hand it is a great opportunity for talks without the social inhibition of public venues. Grab that opportunity to deepen the conversation. If there is incompatibility it is better to find out virtually before you’ve made a physical commitment. That said, remember if you are just dating either of you may communicate with other people too without being considereda cheater.

Make it a “Stay-cation”

Just because you cannot go out does not mean you can’t make it an occasion. Prepare a nice meal. Even if it is just you, remember you deserve it. If you are together, so much the better. Set the table, put on some music and dress up, for yourself and your partner if you have one. If you are living with other family members you can still celebrate the time you have together.

Making that effort will boost your morale. Even if you are on your own you can still use technology to connect with family or friends. My husband and one of our children are 7500 miles away, that sucks but we are trying to be patient and leverage technology. Organize a watch party or play games via video conferencing. A little imagination can go a long way.

Quarantine Best Practices

Hygiene is paramount, but mental self-care is also essential. Structure your day to include total body exercise and other activities you enjoy. Staying active and interested bolsters immune system health. Yes you need to eat, but you also need intellectual and even erotic stimulation. Sex helps counter anxiety. Loving yourself, physically, is not only safe sex, it can be immensely satisfying too. Social distancing can provide the time and space to explore your own erogenous zones which will enrich your sex life in the long run. Best of all, even if you are in a committed relationship, sex with your self is not cheating!

Whether you are on covid-19lock-downalone, with a lover or your entire family there are a lot of things you can do to get through it. Reading aloud is an experience most of us thought we left back in elementary school. If the book has dialogue you can play with character voices or assign roles to family members. If you are reading to your lover, you can use the story as a seduction tool.

Stay active, stay engaged, stay safe!

To learn more about reconciling a relationship after infidelity read this:

To learn more about how we safeguard you against cheaters visit:

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